My rhythm's off
My eyes won't close
I stare off into the dark abyss displayed before me
Its my room
Its as active as night and yet I can't get to sleep.
I turn to the left and the faces of my dolls taunt me with wide eyes.
I wonder if that's how wide mine are at that time.
I turn to my right to see my cat mocking me with closed eyes
Even though he hums a song of slumber, I can't seem to close my eyes.
I turn onto my back and stare at the ceiling.
Darkness,
but my eyes start to close.
Discomfort,
and I feel the sheets constrict me.
The pillow under my head pounds against my neck and back
I can't sleep on my back
I choke
I flip onto my stomach
I can breath
My intakes are deep and I feel my nostrils widen and narrow.
The pillow now embraces me
And my heartbeat thuds against the mattress
My eyes start to close
But I'm not asleep
I'm just trying to fool myself
Tell myself
Man I'm so tired.
I'm not lying
But I'm not truthful
I stay unconvinced until I black out
Dreamless sleep
Nothing goes on anymore in my head
Its just black and I remember it all
Nothing
Deprived of sleep the whole summer and I'm sick
I'm tired
I'm lacking
I'm slacking
I'm suffering
My body
My mind
There's nothing
I'm empty
But full
I'm working
I'm running
Not on fuel
But on determination
I want to succeed
I want to redeem
I want to improve
I want to impress
Nothing will hold me back
And everyday, I'm shown that I can
That I do
And that I will
Sleep cannot deprive my drive
Not only to succeed, but to survive
Survive the hardships I weight myself down with
So I will accomplish this goal
Its the only dream I have nowadays
And I won't let it take a toll.